summer vacation

So obviously being a working mom has limited my ability to keep up with this blog.  I am trying to figure out a way to remedy that!  But right now, it is summer break.  I have the next month off of work with my little Miss A and I am super excited about it.

Why only one month you ask?  Aren't teachers supposed to get three months off?  Well yes, and no.  I work at an extended year school, so we go to school 5 weeks in the middle of summer (yes, extra school).  The students actually attend school about 25 more days a year than traditional schools.  As for us teachers, if we work our 25 summer days, we get to take 25 days off in the regular part of the year (because the district is too cheap to pay us.  Cheaper for them to pay a sub and give us the days off).  But in the case of Miss A, this works brilliantly!  With those 25 days I am able to take most Fridays off during the year to be with her.  A four day work week is nothing to scoff at!

So what plans do we have?  None really.  Just time to hang out and have mini-adventures with my little girl.  Who by the way has 2 teeth, is sitting up, slept through the night (I am talking 10-11 hour stretches) 3 out of the last 4 nights, eating solid food like it is going out of style and bathing on the "toddler" side of her bathtub!  And now that I am off work, maybe I will get a chance to blog about some of those amazing things she is capable of!

neglect

and not of Miss A, but of the husband.  Today a quick conversation went like this:

husband: tell me you love me.
me: i love you
husband: do you really love me?
me: no (totally sarcastic)
husband: you don't anymore do you?

Now he was half joking....catch the word "half"?  He is feeling neglected.  I don't laugh at his jokes as easily or as often anymore.  I do not stay up late with him to watch movies anymore.  Our conversations mostly center around Avery.  I think he is starting to feel like my roommate more than my husband (you get where I am going with that one?).

I sat and thought about it for a bit.  I realized that I am often rushing through our conversations so I can get on to the next thing.  I have a whole other human being to take care of and that takes a lot of time.  I have been so focused on being mommy that I have forgotten what it is like to be Andrea.  I thought going back to work would help that a bit, but in reality it has only made it worse.  Now I am Mommy and Teacher with a splash of Wife.  And somewhere buried underneath there is Andrea.  Now I understand that Andrea is part of all of those titles, but do you get where I am coming from?

How do I find time to go to work full time, feel satisfied with the amount of love and energy I am giving to Avery, dote on my husband, keep up with the household duties and still find time for ME!  I have been going pretty easy on myself up until this weekend because I knew it was going to take time to adjust, but the combination of Avery turning 6 months next week and the conversation with the husband today really got me concerned that I am not juggling/balancing it all well enough.

Anyone else out there feeling this a bit?